I am tired of being fat and unhealthy. Its hard to feel happy when I feel so disgusted in my own skin. I have thought of "trying" to induce vomiting on more than one occasion but just cant bring myself to do it. I've thought about how nice it would be to just pull my belly fat up and cut it off. Yes that is morbid but only if it were that easy. I often feel sorry for my husband because he has to look at me and pretend to think I am sexy. Poor, poor guy. He takes such amazing care of himself and only wants me to be healthy and follow in his footsteps. I love him for loving me for my most fabulous personality ;)
I have to admit that I am a bit of a scale addict. I ended up taking the battery out of our scale here at home and have not stepped foot on it for about a month. I am terrified to even know what my starting weight will be. The scale is the devil I swear. When our scale is in working order I will step on it at the least 3 times a day but most often upwards of 10 times a day. Every time I get on there I get more discouraged and pissed off. My husband has hid the scale on more than one occasion. I am hoping that when I step my bare feet on that bitch of a machine at MMC weight management on January 3, 2014 I will be able to stay positive. I intend to post all of my stats as embarrassing and as shameful as it will be on that day. I have big goals and am hoping I will reach them. If I'm being positive I am supposed to say I WILL reach them!! What is my goal? I intend to lose upwards of 50 pounds. I intend to become stronger and healthier. I intend to work on my running (which I LOVE) and reach personal bests.
I hope all of you can find some comfort and enjoy reading this blog. I'm a real woman with real difficulty losing weight and having will power. Here's to a awesome 2014!
What are your weight loss goals? What are your resolutions?
love you Autumn! you will do great! and hopefully after the twins ill be on this journey with you!
ReplyDeleteThank you my sweet friend! I love you!
DeleteI'm starting this journey alongside you. After reading your post, I must say I have some of the exact thoughts as you. While I do want to loose weight for myself and my kids....I want my hubby to be proud of me. We have been married for 10 years, and while I have never been skinny, I weighed a lot less 10 years ago. We have the possibility of going to a wedding in Pennsylvania in October for a guy he knows....and I want to look good at that wedding!! Tomorrow is day 1. Best of luck to you as you start your own journey!!
ReplyDeleteExcited to hear about your accomplishments! I'm comforted knowing you have had thoughts like mine. I'm started Jan 1st. I know if I try before then I'd be setting myself up for failure! Good luck Pam!!!
DeleteBest of luck to you! I'll tell you what I told one of my other cousins don't call it a diet call it a lifestyle change. Watch you portions and don't deprive yourself of anything. I you want a piece of cake have one but just a small piece. Soft drinks are a bad idea even diet ones. Drink lots of water. The most important thing is to exercise. 12 yrs ago I was a size 14 I'm now a size 4. I watch my portions and never have seconds. You can do it girl!
ReplyDeleteThank you Brenda!
DeleteYou can do it, Autumn!!!
ReplyDeleteThank you for the confidence booster!
Delete